00:08 Hi, I'm Denise Simpson, a master life and leadership coach who helps women step into their authentic and feminine power. So they can lead like visionaries influence with grace, create a legacy of contribution and service. You'll hear about real leadership clients with real problems, navigating their success in life, business, and career. If you are ready to become a masterful leader, then this podcast was made for you. So let's get started.
00:46 What I know to be true is that thoughts turn to things. Hey there, welcome to what I know to be true. Again, this is a little mini series. If you haven't heard the first two, go back and, and listen to those. These are very short episodes on what I know to be true. And I may not know a lot of, a lot of things. my, my learnings are limited in that I am an expert in leadership. I'm an expert in the diad relationship of leader and follower. I am always putting my leader brains under the microscope. And so there are trend patterns, conditioning that, that I see in most leaders that I serve and I want wanted to do this series so that I could pick a topic to really explore and really to provide provocative insight. Honestly, I really wanna get your brain stirred up.
01:39 So today we're gonna talk about thoughts. Now, did you know my friend that we have 65,000 to 90,000 thoughts a day that's neuroscience? I can't make that up. That is what is agreed upon in the neuroscience field. This is how many thoughts we think a day now for you and I we're leaders. So we're thinking on our feet all the time. From the time we get up to the time we come home, maybe the time we go to bed, right? Cause at, you know, in the evening, we're probably ruminating over what happened during the day. And we're just running scenarios and circumstances in our minds. And we're like, I should have said that maybe I shouldn't have done that. Ooh, I, I forgot to do that. And so here we are running probably at that 90,000 thought a scale. And so thoughts, aren't always necessary to challenge.
02:31 They're not always necessary to ruminate over, right? Thoughts are like clouds in the sky. They come and they go, right. Some days the sun is shining through them and you're having positive, loving, energized, seeing powerful thoughts. And then sometimes it's a thunderstorm. And you know, the thought, or I should say the cloud is heavy in lots of thoughts and angry thoughts. And, and you know, you're in a moment where, where you're feeling some very heavy emotion, right? So thoughts are, are passing through the sky all day, every day. And so our job is to remember that not every thought has to be entertained. Not every thought needs to be entertained. What I want for you to pay attention to are the thoughts that you are entertaining. What thoughts are ruminating, what thoughts are just idling there in your mind, thoughts about your body, thoughts about your intimacy, thoughts about your leadership, thoughts about your personal finances, thoughts about your children, thoughts about your parenting, thoughts about the government, thoughts about this pandemic.
03:47 What thoughts are idling every day? You know, for me, it's my weight. I gotta be honest with you. I have to be honest with you. This is the one area in my life that has been interesting. So yes. Thoughts come in. Thoughts come out, right? I'm at the gym. I feel like an athlete. That's the thought that I hold onto as I'm working out and then I go home and then I'm ready to make dinner. And then I start thinking ohoh, it's gotta be low carb. Or it has to be keto 10 day, or it has to be this, or it has to be that. And then I start thinking the thought, oh my God, my weight, my weight. Ugh. If I eat that, then I'm probably gonna gain weight. And so all these thoughts just start running through my mind. And then it floods my brain with emotion.
04:37 And so I'm feeling all kinds of things, cuz all these thoughts are, are producing an emotion. And so then I stay stuck and then I panic a little bit and then I just go numb. And I say, you know what, forget it. I'm just gonna go to McDonald's chip Otlet or you know, pick up something to drive through. Cause I just, I cannot keep thinking about this and forget it. It's just pointless. And that's how we create the result of an overweight body, right? Because we are not acknowledging these thoughts and we're not stopping. Right. We're not stopping because here's the thought that's ruminating. It's idling constant. So we got, we have to smoke them out so to speak, we gotta, we gotta put them under the microscope. Well, what's that thought? What's that thought that's greeting this specific result. So when I said thoughts, turn to things, this is what I mean the linear track is you have a belief system that influences your thoughts about that thing or that context, those thoughts then produce an emotion in your body.
05:39 Emotions like fear, emotions, scarcity, emotions, like happiness, emotions like abundance and those emotions inspire action or inaction. So when I'm feeling fear, I freeze I'll freeze. I'll I'll just, I won't do anything. Or when I'm feeling desperate, I wanna numb that with food. So the action I take is to go and indulge in food and overeat just so I could suppress that emotion. I wanna, I wanna just stomp it out. And I do that with eating so that my brain then try dopamine in my head when I eat. And it's like, ah, it's soothing out that feeling. That's why we do what we do. Right? We do what we do because it's all linked to these thoughts. So the result that we create in our lives are an overweight body or a divorce or a bankruptcy or you know, self sabotage, all the results that you create in your life are linked to these thoughts.
06:45 So that's what I mean by thoughts, turn two things. So we need to be careful with that. So I always want for you to look and check in with your results, the results you've created in your life. And like right that out the result I created was weight gain. You know, for me it was 20 pounds through the whole IVF process through COVID through, through all of that craziness. That's what is that's what's been sitting on my body and extra 20 pounds of weight. That's a result and I can link it back to the, these thoughts, various thoughts. It's okay. I mean, I may not have had 65,000 thoughts of my, of, of my weight, but there were a handful of them that were really critical and a handful of them that were, were very, very dangerous because it just keeps repeating the cycle of, of the weight on my body.
07:39 And nothing that I do is, is, is releasing that weight from my body. So we have to be careful with these thoughts. Now, listen, again, not every thought needs to be entertained, but look at the result you've created. And if that result is unfulfilling and that result is causing more pain and suffering, then fulfill and happiness, then that's the area of your life. We wanna look at. That's what we wanna focus on and then link it back to thoughts. And when you write down thoughts, make sure it's in a clear declarative sentence, one sentence. This is not a run on paragraph. This is not, you know, a, a complex sentence. No, it is one simple sentence. One simple sentence that your brain can see the simplicity of this one thought and that thought causing this one particular emotion that is then causing an action or inaction. And then ultimately because of the action or inaction, you are creating a result in your life. So thoughts turn to things, thoughts turn to things. And a belief is just a thought you've kept thinking about over and over and over again where it's now a belief system. It is now part of your neural pathway.
08:57 So if you want to listen to the last, to what I know to be true episodes, I did one on beliefs and I did one on emotions. And this is the one we're talking about. Thoughts, your thoughts, 65,000 to 90,000 a day. But again, do not entertain every single thought that comes through. It's the ones that we latch onto that our neurology latches onto. It's the ones that are probably the most traumatic. It's probably the ones that caused, caused most, most of, um, I'd say like an emotional trigger within you. It could have been an emotional event or circumstance in your life that caused a jolt in your neurology. And that one thought is latched on, you know, perhaps that's how you wanna look at these thoughts that are idling by they're. And I mean idling, as in they're waiting, they're just there. They're there.
09:56 When, when you wake up, they're there. When you go to bed, they're there. When you are putting on your clothes in the morning, they're there. When you're eating and having your breakfast, they're there. When you're having a glass of wine with your girlfriends, they're there. When you're at happy hour, they're there when you're at the gym, right? It's these thoughts that are idling by just waiting for you to have a relapse or a moment where they can latch on and bring to your attention that you've gained all this weight. And this is why you look the way you look. And this is why you won't lose that 20 pounds. This is why you're not an athlete. This is why this isn't worth it. Go to the drive through. So understand that you have, have control of your thoughts. You can smoke them out, write them out, which are the ones that we need to look at a little closer.
10:46 These are the thoughts that are creating this result in my life. And what thoughts do I wanna think instead onto your brain? It's a sneaky one. Your brain is so sneaky. Plus it loves automation. It's a lazy brain. I have to tell you. And automation looks like habitual thinking. It's the habitual belief system. It's like, oh, that's, that's just what we do. We go to the drive through when, when we feel like we need a numb out or when we feel like we are in defeat or you know, we're defensive up. That's what we do. It automates your behavior so that you don't have to discipline yourself beyond that brain of yours. Love it, but be on to it. Don't be so hard on yourself. I mean, that's what I have to tell myself every day. It's like, you're doing the best you can. Every single day.
11:37 I can't look a year from now. I'm right here. I go to the gym. I eat the best food I can find. That's, you know, quality, nutritious food. It's good for my body. And that's all I can do at this point. I cannot look beyond that. I'm doing the best I can today. So don't beat yourself up. We don't beat our brains into submission. We discipline them. We find awareness around the thoughts. We find awareness around the results we've created and we're kind to ourselves in this process. All right, my friend. So what I know to be true is that your thoughts turn to things.
12:22 Hey,
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13:15 I.
