Leader, you were born for this, but somewhere between the toxic leaders, broken systems, and workplace trauma, you forgot why you said yes to leadership. This show is your invitation to descend, to anchor, to find the stillness beneath the noise so you can ascend back to your team with clarity, conviction, and renewed purpose. I'm Dr. Denise Simpson, and I will guide you through five principles that restore your wholeness and call you back to your original assignment. Join me now so we can go deeper. It's time to find your way back. Hi, welcome back to our season finale. I am thrilled that we have gotten here together. I'm so excited that you've been on this journey with me thus far. And we're going to end this season with our fifth and final anchor. And I'm excited to get started. Now listen, last episode, this stupid mic was not working. Thought it was. User error. I'm sure it's a great mic. I just bought it, so I'm learning more about it. And I just checked everything and everything looks okay. Everything is on. So I'm not going to touch this mic. I'm just going to let it do its thing because I'm afraid I'm going to mute this accidentally and then have crappy audio. audio for this episode. So I wanted to get that out of the way because some of you DMed me and said, your mic's not on and it sucks. Okay. Sorry about that. I'm a one woman show. I don't have a producer. I don't have anybody editing anything for me. I do this all on StreamYard, by the way, and a USB mic. That's all I have. That's all I need. I need to get the message out and I'm going to do whatever it takes. And I don't care if I sound crappy or sound perfect. You get what we get. We get what we get. So anyway, that's a side note. I am happy that we are wrapping this season up together because it's been a journey. And if you recall our initial question, the initial research question, because I'm a researcher and my mind always thinks in questions and always looking for ways to deduce things and solve for things. And the question that is near and dear to my heart and very personal to me was, can I be an effective leader without sacrificing my soul? Because my soul was deflated. My soul was depleted. My soul had become distorted. And I needed a moment for myself to realign, to recalibrate, to remember why I was called into leadership. And that question has led us to this final anchor, this fifth and final anchor. I like to remind you, especially if you are new into this world of the anchor method, I like to give a brief summary of what we've talked about so far. And so I'm going to do that very quickly for you. I have this anchor method that I use that I have used for myself for a very long time. And it's not rooted in empirical research, so to speak. It's on a leadership style and I don't have... a bunch of research to support this method that I use. Listen, I'm a public academic. I'm not interested in going through those hoops and sacrificing my soul for an empirical badge on my methods and frameworks and leadership styles that I come up with. So we're not into that around here. So this very, very intimate method is true for me. It works for me. I'm not an expert in anything, by the way. I am somebody who shares her love and passion for the leader, especially for those of you out here leading in such tumultuous, uncertain, overwhelming times. I am your biggest cheerleader, your biggest supporter, and I'm here to guide you in any way that I can. because I have some experience, because I have some educational stuff, whatever. I'm here as a leader, just like you, in the trenches, molding the clay, dealing with all of this uncertainty. And doing the best I can to return to my original assignment, my original calling so that I can reemerge greater, smarter, more compassionate, and more clear in my leadership. And so that's really the essence of the anchor method. And we use this metaphor of the anchor. It's more than that. I mean, it's a feeling, honey. We are anchored in our bodies. We're anchored in our solar plexus. We feel the strength and the confidence and yes, the certainty in our bellies. And this is why we're so connected to our bodies as contemplative leaders. And this anchor has been very important for me and for many of my clients because it symbolizes who we need to be in the middle of the chaos, in the middle of the storms, in the middle of the uncertainty. We are captains in our individual lives. boats. I mean, I may be on a dinghy over here, but you may be on a yacht and somebody over here may be on a cruise liner. I don't know. And that dude over there on a pirate ship, but whatever. We're all on our boats, okay? We're on our boats and we have people on those boats. And we raised our hands to say, yes, put me in. I will lead the collective. I'm the one. I'm the chick. I'm the dude. I'm the non-binary human here saying, let's go. I'm here to lead these people forward. So you raised your hand. Ooh, that's a whole other conversation that we can have. But you're here now. You raised your hand. You're in the middle of some storms. Yeah. And these storms are unlike anything we've seen before because things are moving faster, quicker, more violently. Oh, there is such turmoil out here, out here in the world that we lead in. that's external storms, external variables, external things that we have to navigate through. But we also have internal storms in our own minds, right? The psychological crisis and the psychological chaos that we have in our own minds and in our own bodies and nervous systems. And so my whole being or my whole reason for existing these days is to show leaders like us, like you, who raised their hands, who were so courageous and who are still in the game. I want to help you with this very specific method that I use to support in you staying in leadership. So many people out here are saying, peace, I'm out of here. I'm about to go and start my own business. I'm about to go start my own consulting firm. I'm out of here. I'm going back to school or I'm going to run away somewhere, but I'm done. I'm done. So many of you are not ready to retire. So many of you are saying, is there an alternative here? Because I can't do this. And I do need to make a living. And I actually really care about my collective and my group and my company. I really do care deeply. But I don't have the tools to help me sustain, to help me with longevity here. I need help. This is beyond burnout. Burnout is the first sign. Burnout is the first signal. It's like, oh, okay, there is a sign. I'm burnt the hell out and I'm ready to do something differently. And the first thing we do is quiet quit on our organizations. We quiet quit on our own leaders. And for somebody who's done extensive research on organizational commitment and engagement, I know the relationship between leader and that follower and how important it is to keep that relationship open. trusting. Oh, I mean, even vulnerable, transparent, compassionate. This relationship between follower and leader is so critical now more than ever. And I spent all of my doctoral career researching that very specific dyad of leader and follower. So I'm obsessed with leader psychology. I'm obsessed with the correlational relationships between the leader's behaviors. Ah, and the follower's results, response to the leader's behaviors. It is just a beautiful relationship that we have with our teammates, with our followers, with our employees. I mean, life is about relationshiping. Everything is about relationshiping and this is no different. And so this, however, is all about the relationship you have with yourself. the most important relationship ever is the one you have with yourself. That's where it begins. That's where it begins. And then the output, right? We get to see the relationship that we have internally with ourselves. We get to see the output in the So if the result or results you're creating out in the organization, just look at your team. How are they performing? How are they behaving? How are they treating one another? How are they treating you? That's a direct correlation to you and the relationship you have with yourself. I know it stings for some of you and for others. You are open to hearing this. Oh, and those are my people. You are my people. Those of you who are saying, yeah, you know what? That makes sense. And okay, I'm ready to look at the hard stuff. I'm not afraid. Tell me, Denise. Tell me. Tell me what I can do differently. Tell me how to lead differently because this is painful. This hurts. And I don't want to keep doing this like this in this organization anymore. Ooh, you're in the right place. You're in the right place. So this anchor method, wow, what a personal experience that was for me to realize that I was the one with all the power. I'm the one that had all of the answers right here within my soul, within my heart, within my mind, within my nervous system, within my body. Oh my goodness. So looking at these external factors and looking at these external variables that I have no control over. Okay, cool. I have no control over what the administration is going to do with federal budgets right now. Okay, yes. And I have no control over what the board of directors are going to implement into my region or division or department. Okay. Those are uncontrollable variables. We have no say in how that goes, but we do have control over how we respond. And that is my field of study right now with you. You. So how do you respond to uncertainty? How do you respond to the overwhelm with AI right now? How do you respond to your employee's quiet quitting on you, disengaged, not committed, disrespectful maybe. How do you respond? And so that is always at the top of my research, always at the top of what I share with you because I am very, very invested in the relationship you have with yourself as a leader. So this anchor symbol, It's very important to me. And now it's becoming very important to some of you because you are now seeing yourself as the anchor. So there you are, captain of your boat, whatever size that boat is, whatever size of people you lead, whatever, right? I have a team of three people. You may have a team of five hundred. I don't know. And then he may have a team of ten and she may have a team of ten thousand. Cool. Whatever, wherever you are, wherever you're finding yourself right now, this applies to you. And it also applies to whether you're an emerging leader. You're brand new. You're new to the journey. Oh, I'm so excited. You're new in the pipeline of leadership. How exciting for you. Wow. Wow. Brave soul you are. And what if you're mid-career? Wherever you are, maybe mid-manager, mid-level manager. cool. This also applies to you, my friend. And what if you are a CEO of a fortune five hundred organization? This most definitely applies to you. What if you're leading your community members and you're in public office and you have these constituents that you are responsible and leading? Oh, most definitely this is for you. So if you have this label, a formal label of leader, either through nonprofit work, either through public office, federal work, for-profit like me, or wherever you're finding yourself, know that this applies to you, to all of us, which is why this is so universal. And it's encompassing of... of what we all go through as leaders, the uncertainty, the overwhelm, the exhaustion, the spiritual exhaustion, the spiritual disconnection, the nervous system, you know, imbalances that we have in our bodies. We all experience a lot of the same things, but with different faces, different groups of people, different circumstances. But we are experiencing a lot of the same things. And this is why this anchor method is so important to be open to. So that's all I ask is you be open to how this can work for you in your specific area, with your specific people, on your specific journey in leadership. So there you are on that boat, leading those incredible souls. And you are now facing a storm, a storm that you feel you're unequipped for. You may have the skills, actually. You may have the competency, but you don't have the mindset to ground you, to anchor you. Because maybe this is a different storm and your brain is saying, oh, we're going to die. We're all going to drown here. There's just no way you're going to get through this storm. And you feel it in your body. You feel the overwhelm. You feel the stress, the restless nights, the sleepless nights. Maybe you are resentful. Maybe there's some influx of moodiness, of bitterness, of resentment. You're experiencing agitation and friction within yourself and with others. Those are signs that you are battling something, especially if this is a mindset crisis, and this is mindset. I teach competencies all day, every day in my certifications. I have an institute. I teach leadership students on mindset, skillset, and strategies. So you may be coming to the table with a ton of skills, honey, and you are masterful at these skills. And you may have strategies upon strategies that you've used and have been successful. Fantastic. But the number one variable that we're looking at right now is the mindset variable. We're not talking about the skill set variable or the strategy variable. We are focused on the mindset variable. And I always say you can't outthink, outrun a bad limiting belief. You cannot do that with skills and strategies. It'll catch up to you. And this is why burnout is so critical in our line of work. And so here you are on those boats, you on your individual boat, and I'm just a few yards away from you maybe or a few miles from you, but I'm on my boat with my team. And I'm facing a very interesting storm that's coming from the east, and maybe you're experiencing the storm that's coming from the west. And we are on our boats, and we're doing the best we can, and we all want the best for our teams. We want the best for the people that are on the boat that we're serving. And we're finding ourselves with different coping mechanisms, coping strategies, mental health strategies. We are coming to each of these circumstances, these storms, with a different pair of eyes and a different perspective on life and on leadership. We have different brains, which means we have different nervous systems. And we have different souls. So, of course, we're going to experience the storms differently. But you, my friend, you're on your boat. And what I'm proposing that you do, because this has worked for me and many of my students and many of my clients, is this. We descend. We don't run away from the storm, but we choose to descend. Descend from the chaos. Because I always say, I need to know when your thoughts end and mine begin. Because in this brain of mine, in this mind of mine, there is a storm. There are lots of ideas, lots of people talking to me, lots of opinions, lots of judgment. Oh my goodness, I can't think for myself if I'm in the middle of a storm. And when you're looking at the brain and what is happening when a person is under duress, under distress, under stress in this way, the prefrontal cortex of the brain shuts down. That's your executive decision-making part of the brain right freaking here. So when you are agitated, when you are faced with some uncertainty and there's friction in your body, best believe that part of the brain starts to slow down and another part of the brain, the amygdala starts to light up on fire. And that's where you feel like you've been emotionally hijacked. Some of you have described that to me. I don't know where all these emotions came from. They just popped out of nowhere. No, well, there's structure, anatomy. There are things happening in the brain itself that is making you feel this way. And so here you are under duress. And I'm proposing that you descend. Yeah, descend, distance, detach even. Just give your mind a break. Give your body a moment to catch up. Give your nervous system what it needs in the moment to calm down and regulate again. This is what I mean by descending. So you're on that boat and your team's on that boat and that storm is coming and you're freaking the fuck out. What am I asking you to do? Which is so counterintuitive to what leadership models are telling you to do. Go in, go in, go hard, hustle, face it head on. No, I'm asking you to descend because I know what's happening in the brain and in the body and in the nervous system. And so I'm asking you to descend. I know it's counterintuitive. But trust me on this. I've been doing this a long time. I've been helping a lot of people in this way. And so we descend from the chaos. We're not running away from it. We're just giving ourselves a moment to breathe. And so we descend. And I like to picture us descending down below, down below to the bottom of the ocean floor, away from the chaos, away from the violent waves, away from those judgmental opinions and ideas and people at the top of that, on that boat or around that boat of yours. This is an opportunity for you to descend down below. And what do we do down below once we hit the bottom of the ocean floor? We anchor. We anchor into truth. And that's why these five anchor points, these five principles are so important because we anchor into these five. It's a very simple concept, but it's really hard for those of us who are programmed to hustle and to burn out and to not know anything other than burnout. It's hard for us to see that there's a way out, especially something like this that's so counterintuitive to what you've been taught. I know because I used to teach the hustle culture. I used to teach go, go, go. I used to teach no emotions here. Leave those at home. Go put them in a box because they don't belong here. I know. I perpetuated those toxic, dangerous leadership models. I know. So I know how difficult this may be for some of us to hear. You want me to descend? You want me to anchor? What do you mean? I have to be reactive. I have to be quick. Don't you see my hair's on fire? The team's about to die on this boat and I have to put out this fire. I have to do something about it. No, just pause and wait a minute. I know you've been taught to just keep going, but this is why you're sacrificing yourself. You have sacrificed your soul. You're destroying yourself along the way. So if my goal is to keep you in the pipeline of leadership as long as possible, then I'm going to provide you with a solution. More importantly, the remedy, the salve, the balm, the soothing balm to keep you in the pipeline of leadership. But not just the way you were before. No. Once we anchor, And to those five anchor points, we then ascend back into leadership, stronger, more vigorous, creative, clear-minded, more courageous. Don't you see how this is the cycle? Anytime a storm comes through, I ask you to descend down below, you anchor to those five anchor points, and then you ascend back. And then another storm comes through and here we go again. Let's descend again. Let's anchor again. Let's ascend back into our teams. Okay, cool. And then another storm comes through and we're doing the same cycle. It's a cycle. This is never ending. It's not okay one time and we're done. No, this is a perpetual cycle. So those anchor points are so critical. And the fifth one that I will mention to you today is the last anchor before we ascend. And that is the transformational anchor. This is the impact anchor. How impactful and transformative can we be in our leadership? So the first anchor was the purpose anchor. This is you asking yourself why I'm leading. Why was I called? Is this a calling? Is this my divine calling? Is this my original assignment? What am I doing here with these very specific people that I inherited or these people that I hired? Why? Why do I lead? That's an important anchor. to return to. The second anchor is the responsibility anchor. This is where I have you look at your sacred responsibilities because it's important to remind ourselves and to anchor back into who we serve. And the third anchor is the vision anchor. And I talked about this in the perspective of expansive vision, having foresight, seeing further, farther, deeper, wider than anybody else in your collective can. Where are we going? Where are you taking them? That's important to anchor yourself back into. The fourth anchor is the presence anchor. It's you showing up in your fullest, in your glory. Oh my goodness. It's who you are. So those are the four anchor points and they're sequential. We start with that first one always. Why do we lead? Why am I leading? What is my divine calling? Because mine's different than yours. And then we move into those next anchors. And this is the final anchor. And this final anchor is the impact anchor. How you lead and how you show up when you are reminded of who you are and who you serve and where you're taking this collective and how you're showing up every single day, even through the crisis, even through the calm moments, because that is going to determine how you lead. And we want to leave our collective better than we found them, honey. We're not in leadership just for the pay, just for the salary, just for the credibility or the credentials. No, it's because we were called into these leadership roles. And this is my job is to remind you of that. So when we anchor into those five anchors, then we can ascend. We go right back up into our boats and we show up fully integrated, not fragmented, not burnt out, not shitty, not mean. We're compassionate. We're full of courage and conviction and clarity. And we're excited to be there. And we're excited to face the uncertainty together. You want the clear mind. You want the clear heart. You want to be firing on all cylinders because that is your job as the leader. And so this is why that pause, it's a sacred pause. It's a sacred moment that we take so that we can descend down below. Now, it can look like five minutes behind closed doors. It could look like thirty minutes. It could look like a week. My team knows I have to sleep on on things. Yep. They'll present some problems. And I always tell them, you're going to come to me with a problem, but you will come to me with three different solutions, three different ideas. Even though they're not vetted, even though they're not proven, just bring me three possible solutions. And then when they do, I ask them to give me a moment because this is me descending. This is me anchoring. This is me reminding myself why I was called into leadership, why I'm here, why I'm in this industry, why I'm serving so many out here. why why why i have to remind myself yes we have to be active in reminding ourselves why we were called who we're here to serve where we're going where we're taking this collective who i am and the impact that i want to have through my leadership you're responsible for this work leader And so when I tell my team, give me a day, and then maybe I come back in twenty four hours and I tell them, give me another day. I'm going to need some more time on this one. And sometimes because my intuition and intuition is just a collection of experiences and memories and lessons and wisdom. That's what your intuition is. That's what mine is. And so sometimes a decision is so fast. I'm like, yep, go for it. Move on. Yep. Go forth with that. And then sometimes I, ooh, if that storm's really harsh and I hadn't seen one like this before, and these are different players with different agendas and different circumstances. And I'm like, oh, I'm going to need some time on this one. Okay. And my team knows this because obviously they're watching my work and they're in my groups and they're teaching and helping me teach my students. So they're very familiar with this work. But if you want your team to better understand why you need some time to contemplate and to take a moment and explain to them what this is about, tell them, I don't want to lead you or this team in this uncertain time in this organization without anchoring myself, without grounding myself, without knowing why we're here, what I'm here to do, how I'm supposed to lead you. I need a moment or two to contemplate this. And don't worry, I'll be right back because I'm not going to leave you alone for long in that boat. But I owe this to myself and to you all to take a moment to just think through some things so that you're not reactive. This is proactive work. So you're not running around with your hair on fire. No, actually you're cool, calm, collected because you have a system, because you have a method. You have a coping strategy to go to every single time you're faced with an uncertain circumstance or a storm in your leadership practice. You can use this too in your personal life. I use it all the time. I tell people, do not disturb. I love you all, but can't handle this right now. My capacity for... this circumstance is all I have at the moment and everything else is going to need to just wait. That's not being selfish. That's being selfless because the contemplation, the sacred pause that is needed for me to come back fully alive, fully aligned, fully rejuvenated, ready to serve is what's necessary for me. And it could be something that you may want to consider doing for yourself. So this last anchor, and I'll leave you these last few thoughts that I have about this anchor. The transformational impact that we all want to have in our lives, in our families, in our communities, with our teams. This is part of your legacy. I don't know if you've ever done legacy work and that's just contemplation and some reflection on the legacy you want to leave in the community that you serve or even in your family or in the organization. Or the movement that you've started. For me, legacy is important. I'm driven by the impact that I create in my field of study, in my organization, with my team and the teams that I've served before. I am very hyper-focused on leaving my people better than I found them. I owe that to them. You owe that to them. Don't just be any shitty leader out there. They've had plenty and you've had plenty too. You and I have experienced some of the worst. And guess what? They're still out there with their own personal toxic agendas. but not you, not me. And this is why when we talk about legacy, it's not about being righteous. No, it's about being humble enough to say, I care deeply and I want to leave an impact of somebody who has served this organization very, very well. So this anchor point just reminds us I'm here because I was called to do this work. I know who I'm here to serve and there is sacred responsibility in who I'm serving. I also know where we're going. I was given this very specific skill set and I've honed it and I've mastered it. And that is the skill of foresight. And I'm able to see further, farther, deeper, wider than anybody else in this collective can. And I am using this to guide and steward my people forward. So you show up differently. You show up fully embodied, fully resourced and confident no matter what storm is in your way. And all of those first four anchor points impact this last one. which is the impact anchor. So those four impact this last one. So keep these five anchors in mind. And if you want to go deeper in this work and you want to experience this firsthand with me, I have a monthly workshop that I do. It's every single month. I have one coming up the first week of August. And you're going to find the link in the show notes below or wherever you're watching this are listening to this, you are going to want to get on that reserve list because it's an intimate setting where I will show you exactly what I do in real life, in real time, so that you can start putting this into practice for yourself. So many people are asking, but is this tangible? Is this something I can actually do? What does it even look like? What does contemplation look like? Is this religious? No, it's not. Because this isn't typical. This is very unusual. Yes, it is. Yes, it is. It's counterintuitive. I've taken on a big movement, my friend. I've taken on a giant movement. One that is going against the... leadership models that I was so convicted in enforcing before. And I'm a different person because circumstances have changed and so have I. And these teachings are, I believe, going to support you on your journey and as long as you want this journey to last. You want longevity. You want to lead differently. You want to stop sacrificing your soul and destroying yourself and others. And this is the solution. So if you're experiencing the burnout, you're experiencing the overwhelm or some kind of friction, agitation right now in your leadership role, try this out and then join me for our monthly podcast. session. And we're experimenting together. You're going to feel this in your body and you're going to find the peace that you've been looking for, but you're going to have to join me to experience that. So make sure you RSVP, reserve your spot and see you very soon in August. All right, leader, what a wonderful season it has been. Thank you for allowing me to serve you. I will be around on all my social feeds and also I will return refreshed, rejuvenated, reinvigorated to serve you because I am ready to descend, anchor into those five principles and then ascend back to you in just a few short weeks. I hope to see you soon, maybe inside my monthly experience workshop that's coming up or on our next season of the podcast show. Thank you all, you especially, and I'll see you all very soon. Take care. Bye. You came here for a reason and that reason is bigger than you know. If today's episode stirred something in you, that stirring is your assignment calling you back. Don't ignore it. Here's what you can do next. Subscribe, leave a review, or share this with a leader who forgot why they said yes. And when you're ready to go deeper, my friend, join me in my program. It's called Anchored. This is where we descend into the five principles that restore your wholeness and return you to your original assignment. The world needs the leader that you were born to be. So head over to my website at drdeniessimpson.com to learn how you can join me inside my program called Anchored. Until next time, take very good care.
