Speaker 1: Hi, I'm Denise Simpson, a master life and leadership coach who helps women step into their authentic and feminine power. So they can lead like visionaries influence with grace and create a legacy of contribution and service. You'll hear about real leadership clients with real problems, navigating their success in life, [00:00:30] business, and career. If you're ready to become a masterful leader, then this podcast was made for you. So let's get started.
Speaker 1: Hey, welcome back, my friend. I hope you are having a fantastic summer. As of this recording. We are in June of 2022 and [00:01:00] I am hoping and praying that you and your family and your followers are doing well. There's so much going on in the world today, as it has been for all of us collectively the last two years. And we find ourselves in some very interesting times right now, economic times, fiscal times that, um, is really hurting some of our people. And so I do pray [00:01:30] and yes, hope that you are safe and sound and that your family and you are doing well. So wanted to start our episode with my sentiments and how I'm feeling about you and thinking about you and praying for you. Let's turn our attention to today's subject matter. Let's talk about the art of your leadership. So we talk about the art and science [00:02:00] of leadership.
Speaker 1: Two big components to your leadership. The art is you, your personality, your moods, your characteristics, your values, your convictions, all of the wonderful things that make you. You, no one on this earth is exactly like you. If we wanna get into the genes and the BI biological underpinnings [00:02:30] of why you are so unique, we can do that. But we won't. What I wanna do is remind you that the art of leadership has 1000% to do with you. The science part of your leadership has to do with your skills and implementation of those skills, demonstrating those skills, creating results for yourself and for your team and your organization. Those are measurable [00:03:00] things. When we think of science, although science, isn't actually exact , uh, coming from a research background, there is always manipulation of numbers, manipulation of questions, and so forth. And so even science, isn't exact, I talked to my husband, who's an MD.
Speaker 1: He'll tell you, medicine is not exact science, which is very, very disappointing, but this is the truth about science and the science part. However, is something [00:03:30] that we get to do through leadership development, leadership, trainings, and workshops. We get to talk about strategies and how to implement these strategies so that you can get a positive result, right? We're always looking at the theory, married to practice. So theoretically, this should work, but in practice, maybe it doesn't. And there's fine tuning between between the theory and the practice that you [00:04:00] do as a leader. And so the science part, I sleep with it. I wake up with it. I dream about it. I'm obsessed with it. The science part is important. Let's not exclude that. But what I want to do today is talk to you about what is as important, which is the art you, that personal part of you only you get to lead [00:04:30] the way you lead, because only you are who you are, your life experiences, your childhood memories, the things that you've learned, the values that are embedded in your neurology, that also includes your bias, your prejudices, and your discriminatory tendencies.
Speaker 1: That's what makes you, you, you have a certain filter of what leadership should be like. And sometimes that filter serves you. [00:05:00] It works in your favor while other times it does not because we are human. And because we do have bias. And because we do have prejudices and discriminatory tendencies that are lurking in our neurology. So two sides to your leadership, the art and the science. And I wanna talk specifically about the art. You again, all of what [00:05:30] I just mentioned, that encompasses you and we talk a lot about authentic leadership around here. And what makes you an authentic leader, bringing your whole self, your whole spirit, your whole energy, your whole heart to your leadership role. There's a lot of critics that have said to me, I don't want you authentic. I don't wanna see you cry. I don't wanna see you vulnerable.
Speaker 1: [00:06:00] I actually don't even wanna have you be transparent. I just want you to come and be a professional. That's what you were hired to do. Screw authenticity. I've had people tell me that I've had leaders tell me that, that they're not interested in their leaders being trained to be authentic. And here's the danger in that. The danger in that is that we start behaving like robots. We start tapping into [00:06:30] what our predecessors, what our past leaders have taught us, toxic leadership. You've heard of the word toxic or the phrase toxic masculinity. We're not digging into men today, but there is a phrase called toxic leadership. And this is when you do not check your brain under the hood and you rely on what you've learned from a very bad former leader, or maybe even a [00:07:00] really toxic current leader. What happens is we are not left to investigate what is true to us, what matters to us? So we start pretending to be somebody else. We start acting like frauds or imposters because we need to fit in because authenticity is not allowed here. So I have to act like somebody else. And I have to put my heart on the shelf, my brain on the shelf [00:07:30] and put on my armor and behave like a robot. And that's dangerous. That leads to toxic leadership. Cuz what you're doing is creating the same cycle of toxicity within your department, among your followers.
Speaker 1: This idea of authentic leadership has always enticed me. I have indulged in [00:08:00] it. I have dug into it for myself, what it means to be authentic. And I tied the word authentic to art. Authentic means genuine. Who are you underneath it all? Who are you bare skinned? Who are you without the masks? That's who I want to know. And that's who I want to, to be led by. And that's how I will therefore lead [00:08:30] my followers as authentic as possible. Now, if you're telling me that authenticity to you means that you are a robot and that's natural and that's organic to you and that's what you've learned. And that means that you're authentic. When you behave in this way, then this podcast episode is not for you. Move on please. But for those of us who cannot hide who we are, who will not remain silent no [00:09:00] longer, who will not pretend like we're somebody else so that we can fit into the mold.
Speaker 1: We will no longer sacrifice our souls, our dignity, our integrity for a seat at the corporate table. We will not do that to ourselves. And if you are that person, who's listening to this saying, that's right, I'm done. I'm done playing this part. That is not who I am. See my [00:09:30] friend, you take your heart and your brain everywhere you go. And this is why you must invest in your brain and in your heart, heart, physical men, uh, you know, exercise, physical exercise, important thought brain. My friend, the brain is where we get to do all of that deeper work so that you can have healthy relationships in the organization so that you can have a healthy perspective on your followers [00:10:00] and their behaviors and the results that they create for you under your leadership, the brain and the heart. Two very important things that we need to focus on.
Speaker 1: And so when we look under the hood and we start looking for ourselves, what is true to us? What is authentic to us? What do we care about? Who do we want to be every day when we show up in front of our followers, what kind of leadership style do we want [00:10:30] to demonstrate on a daily basis? Who are we? Who are you to lead anybody? These are the questions that we ask ourselves while we're looking under the hood of our brains and our hearts. What truly is important to us? What are the values that drive every single decision that I make as a leader? I wanna know these things because this is part of the art of leadership that only I [00:11:00] can carry on that only I can demonstrate. So authenticity and art, two words that are synonymous to me. And so when I started to really look into this idea of authentic leadership, bill George, by the way, amazing author, he has written extensively about authentic leadership and plenty of empirical research to support [00:11:30] his measurement tool that he uses to measure a leader's authenticity.
Speaker 1: And it's something I studied happily during my, uh, doctoral program. There were many other theories that I didn't care for, but this one in particular really struck a chord in me because up until that point, and that was in my, my early thirties, up until that point, I was pretending to be [00:12:00] a former leader, actually, maybe a collection of all of them. I can't pinpoint just the one, but I can definitely think of three that I was displaying. I, what I mean is I was displaying their behaviors. I was displaying their beliefs. I spoke like them. I treated my employees like shit, just like they did with me. I was very transactional because that's what I learned from my [00:12:30] male, former leaders from my female, former leaders, same thing, having to prove your worth, never being questioned, always saying you're only questioning me or challenging me cause I'm a woman, right?
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm a woman too. I don't know what you're talking about. just doesn't make sense. You're directive. I'm just asking for clarification. I remember this one female leader who had so much defensiveness, you can ask her a single thing, [00:13:00] but she always tied it to being a female leader. And now I know why now I know why she was on the defense. She worked really hard to get that position that was, was not occupied by men before by women, before her, it was occupied by men be before her. So she was the first woman to be in this role and she had a lot to prove. And so now looking back at my earlier leaders, [00:13:30] I was so green. I was so new to the leadership industry. I was insecure. I was faking it till I made it. I was relying on what I saw and heard them say as my learning or training ground.
Speaker 1: And I took that as true. I took that as my own. Not realizing that I was suppressing my art, right? As you are [00:14:00] acting like somebody else unconsciously, by the way, unconsciously, let's be very clear here. All this is done at the unconscious level. I wouldn't want to be an asshole. Like my former leaders were. I would, I, you know, that was not intentional to treat my followers the way I did. I just didn't have the proper training. Didn't have the proper leadership knowledge. I didn't have the mindset or the skill set. And there was no way I was gonna implement any strategies. Cause I didn't know any. I was relying on what I learned, what I saw from them, [00:14:30] how they behaved all at the unconscious level. And I then started to behave in the, in their way, in that same way. So this is why we're not authentic because many times we are insecure. We are novices. We are green. We don't have the proper training. And let me tell you something. If your organization is not paying for your professional or personal development, you best be walking into your leader's office [00:15:00] and ask them why you give a third of your life to an organization. Sometimes some of us give more than that. We spend a whole lot of time in our organizations, impacting our followers, creating the results that the organization wants. They are obligated to train you as a leader period.
Speaker 1: So this idea of authenticity is foreign to many people because they think, well, I don't even know what that means, cuz I don't even know who I am. [00:15:30] So how do you want me to carry on the art of leadership when I don't even know who the hell I am? That's a very, very important question because you don't know who you are. You don't know where their beliefs end and yous begin. You don't know where their values end and yours begin. You don't know where their convictions end and yours begin. It is all blurred because we have been unconscious because [00:16:00] we have not been intentional in our leadership. We have not checked under the hood. We have not taken a moment to ask ourselves who am I as a leader? What is important to me as a leader? What do I need to do to be a better leader? Because they deserve a better leader because I deserve to not sacrifice myself anymore. For the sake of this position. These are the questions that I want you to ask yourself.
Speaker 1: [00:16:30] Authenticity is important. My friend, your employees will respond to your true nature. They do not want robots. We have plenty of them that we see on television that we've seen in the military. We've seen in, in the highest levels of government. We see these robots out there telling us what's important for us really, as if we don't have a mind [00:17:00] as if we don't have our own values as if we don't have our own convictions. But here's, what's important to know all of this happens at the unconscious level. We don't just say, oh yeah, I'll take on your values. Yeah. Yeah. Those are important. No, we're not doing that consciously. We're driven by the unconscious mind, my friend, and that is important as a leader to look under the hood, [00:17:30] look at what's going on in your neurology. Look at your beliefs. Look at your bias.
Speaker 1: Look at your prejudices, your discriminatory tendencies. You must, it is your obligation to do that. And we get to do that together through this podcast and through my trainings, it's time to be aware. It's time to be conscious. It's time to be a deliberate leader. It's time to lead intentionally. This is a decision you need to make today. [00:18:00] My friend, I'm here to help you. I have the tools to help you with your mindset, to help you with the development of skills that you need. As you implement these strategies in your leadership, the art and the science to equally important. Parts of your leadership, the science, no problem. My friend, I got you. The art. No problem. My friend, I got you [00:18:30] there too, but you have to say, yes, I am ready to look under the hood. I'm ready to stop some of these behaviors.
Speaker 1: I'm ready to stop these beliefs and I'm ready to create intentionally my leadership practice. And I wanna bring my whole self to this organization every single day, no more hiding who you are. My friend, no more hiding who you are and what you believe and what you stand for. It's time to be more you [00:19:00] in the organization. So my friend, I encourage you to ask yourself these questions today. Who are you as a leader? What do you want in your leadership? What's important to you? What are your convictions? What do you stand for? Start thinking for yourself. And it's good to reflect on the things you've been taking on unconsciously because we need to know [00:19:30] how to move forward consciously and intentionally. We're now fully aware. So the art, my friend is what I want for you to focus on. The science will work on it together. The art begins with you right here right now. All right, my dear friend, I hope you found today's episode helpful. Visit me over on Instagram at Dr. Denise Simpson would love to hear from you my friend. Tell me you heard this episode and tell me a little bit about the art of your leadership. [00:20:00] All right. Have a fantastic week. Take very good care. Bye for now.
Speaker 1: Hey, if you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to join me inside my exclusive coaching membership for women in leadership. Just like you. I wanna help you become a masterful leader with the help of a community of the most powerful women on this planet. My membership [00:20:30] is called masters of leadership. Yes, of course it would be called that . So whether you're a novice or a master, you have to join us. You're gonna get the support that you need and deserve inside my membership. So head over to Dr. Denise simpson.com/m O L. That website again is Dr. Denise simpson.com/m O L. You deserve this, my friend. So join us [00:21:00] inside. See you soon.